[ those aren't words he's expecting to hear tonight. the veneer he wears, thin as it is, starts to crack. ]
But I still...
[ ...shakes his head. ]
No, no, it's okay, really. It was late, and... it's good that one of us was found, at least. And if the others were controlled, they'll be freed. That's a good thing.
[ there is always something good, something worth noting, even in a situation like this. ]
...I don't know. I mean... of all the people the shadows could have chosen, there are plenty who probably would have done a better job of this than I did. It was random in the prism, but I don't know if that's the case here.
And I've never been a fighter, you know? You'd think it would want someone who is. [ ... ] Not that it mattered, I guess.
... I will seek to find an answer, if I am able. And if there is a way to communicate the truth to you, I will.
But I do not think it a matter of being who might be easy to manipulate. After all, that would suggest that Ercnard Sieghart, many years your senior, to be simple. Clementine, who is just as wise beyond her years, to be easier to reach.
[he shakes his head and place a hand upon his shoulder]
... I know you don't. You would never suggest such a thing, because you are a kind person who is always willing to give to others.
I wish only that you would give yourself more grace. You are not simple, or easy to control. Your curiosity and desire to understand are important... but I hope you do not reach for beliefs that might be unkind to yourself.
Until we meet again - for we certainly will - I would appreciate it, if you could remember that for me. Just as I will remember your sincerity, for always.
[ ...his eyes fall to the floor for a moment as he bites his lip. fresh tears prick at his eyes, and - for once, kazunari doesn't ask or wait for permission. he hugs mikazuki, as tightly as he dares. ]
mikazuki is both slightly surprised, and isn't at all. he will accept the embrace willingly, letting his own arms circle around kazunari to warmly hug him in return. his hand will come to rest atop his head, like looking after a child.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
.... no. I disagree. It is not better that it is you. [and he is soft, but firm.] Until the end, I persisted in my wish... that it not be you.
It is you who ought to decide if you can accept my apology - for what was found was not enough.
[even though jiji absolutely went after kaeya pretty recklessly]
no subject
But I still...
[ ...shakes his head. ]
No, no, it's okay, really. It was late, and... it's good that one of us was found, at least. And if the others were controlled, they'll be freed. That's a good thing.
[ there is always something good, something worth noting, even in a situation like this. ]
no subject
... Your heart is very kind, Kazunari Miyoshi.
I know what you have done. I am aware of what it means to take a life - but I know just as well that I do not wish for you to suffer for it.
You may have acted - but the inception of this was not your fault.
[this teenager did not ask to be shadow possessed]
no subject
...I said no. To the shadow, I mean. [ surprising no one, he's sure. ] I never wanted to hurt someone else. Not again.
no subject
... mm. It is good of you. You and Ercnard Sieghart both denied the request, from what I understand...
[ . . . ]
Do you feel frustrated?
[to have been made to act anyway]
no subject
[ a bit of honesty, for once in his life. mikazuki never asked for that like some others have, but there it is. ]
It's the second time something like this has happened to me. I just... wonder what that means. Like... am I that easy to control?
no subject
But I wonder... if perhaps you are trying to find a pattern where none exists.
Why must it be about you? Would it be easier, if you were to believe this was, for some reason, deserved?
no subject
And I've never been a fighter, you know? You'd think it would want someone who is. [ ... ] Not that it mattered, I guess.
no subject
But I do not think it a matter of being who might be easy to manipulate. After all, that would suggest that Ercnard Sieghart, many years your senior, to be simple. Clementine, who is just as wise beyond her years, to be easier to reach.
no subject
That's not... I don't believe that at all. I just wish I understood why.
...Maybe we'll be able to find something, wherever we'll be. Maybe they already have. We'll just have to find a way to tell everyone else.
no subject
... I know you don't. You would never suggest such a thing, because you are a kind person who is always willing to give to others.
I wish only that you would give yourself more grace. You are not simple, or easy to control. Your curiosity and desire to understand are important... but I hope you do not reach for beliefs that might be unkind to yourself.
Until we meet again - for we certainly will - I would appreciate it, if you could remember that for me. Just as I will remember your sincerity, for always.
no subject
I'll try. [ ... ] Thank you.
AAAAAA RAY
mikazuki is both slightly surprised, and isn't at all. he will accept the embrace willingly, letting his own arms circle around kazunari to warmly hug him in return. his hand will come to rest atop his head, like looking after a child.]
There is little to thank me for.
Keep your head held high, Kazunari Miyoshi.
blows a kiss
[ but he leans into the touch, a little, as comfortable as any child could be. ]
I will. Until we meet again, and after.